Tag: <span>#goals</span>

Change

This is not your practice life

Wolf Run mud slide
Are you making the most of what life has to give? Or are you putting off what you really want to do, blaming your fears or the suffocation of the daily grind?

Life is all about the choices we make. We always have a choice – opting for one thing over another, or deciding how to respond to what life throws at us.

This shot is from the Spring Wolf Run in April 2016 – one of my bucket list experiences that I dived into during crisis point. I was hypothermic by this stage in the race and was having to skip the freezing water obstacles (ended up in the med tent to get my temperature back up from 34 C) – but I wasn’t missing the 100-metre mud slide!

If you’ve been wanting to make changes in your life, or life is telling you that you need to, NOW is the time. You don’t have to start with a big bang. That something that’s going to change your life? It starts with small steps, reawakening yourself with new experiences, being kind to yourself and then going out there and absolutely killing it, because you are amazing.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Career development

Dream bigger!

Dream bigger
Last week, I attended a mini-workshop all about tackling fear. On Day 1, ‘Some Kind Of Fairytale’, we each had to write a story.

The story, as you might imagine, was an allegory. I gave mine a happy ending. Which I was then asked to rewrite so it was even happier.

I’m looking at my story now which is full of annotations in the margins. At the end, one annotation stands out. It says DREAM BIGGER!!!

How often do we constrain ourselves without even realising it? Don’t censor your dreams. DREAM BIGGER.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Articles

What’s stopping you?

in brute reality there is no road that is right entirely
One question that often prompts a very enlightening discussion during my coaching sessions is “what’s stopping you?”

A great number of the barriers that hold us back from achieving our goals and dreams are in fact self-constructed.

Perhaps you don’t know where or how to start. You can’t see the woods for the trees, and become overwhelmed by how daunting everything looks. Perhaps you worry about making the wrong decision. Is this what I really want? What if it isn’t the right thing to do? What if I hate it? Perhaps you then over-analyse, exhaustively weighing pros and cons, and end up paralysed by all your options. Perhaps you’re scared of moving out of your comfort zone, and everything looks like a reason not to. It’s not the right time. It’s too risky. Maybe when I win the lottery.

The truth is, there isn’t one right road. There will always be reasons not to. And waiting for everything to fall into place can end up being a very long wait indeed.

You may have heard the saying ‘there’s no such thing as a wrong decision’. You see, how a decision pans out is dependent on a whole range of factors that aren’t necessarily within your control. Selecting the ‘right’ road or taking the ‘correct’ action doesn’t guarantee success. And the converse is also true – making the ‘wrong’ choice doesn’t mean that you’ve set yourself on the path to disappointment. Your action now does not dictate the rest of your life. It’s what you do after you set yourself on any particular path that matters.

If you place too much weight on making the ‘right’ choice, it’s very easy to end up becoming overwhelmed, getting decision paralysis, and stopping before you even start, waiting for something to change your life.

On the other hand, you can take control. Tune into your heart and gut to discover what motivates you and the things that really make you tick. Big goals can be difficult to digest, so think about micro-resolutions – any kind of definitive action, no matter how small. Start moving. Your dream isn’t going to come to you fully formed; it’s going to grow and evolve with every new experience that you have, because it’s your journey that shapes the destination.

Decisions are just decisions. Stop worrying about making the right decision and focus instead on how you’re going to make a decision the right one for you.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Personal development

Self-care

Drawing of a flower
I’ve been thinking about self-care. The course of 2015/16 for me was a year of crisis, during which I learnt how vital it is to be nice to yourself. Everyone’s needs are different, but I thought I’d share some of the things that helped me recover my sanity and wellbeing.

1) Running and spending time outdoors
2) Singing in a choir
3) Leaving work in the office
4) Seeking out new experiences
5) Listening to lots of new music
6) Giving and getting hugs (and flowers!)
7) Not taking things personally
8) Knowing when to say no
9) Making micro-resolutions
10) And remembering:
– Not everything has to be excellent
– No one has everything sorted out
– Sometimes it’s all just stuff.

What do you do for self-care?

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Coaching

Coaching for confidence, focus and resilience

Piano played by the Beatles
Earlier this year I had the wonderful opportunity to play the iconic piano used by the Beatles in Studio 2 at Abbey Road Studios.

Negotiating with my 9 year-old recently about his piano practice I was reminded of this photograph – well-worn keys reflecting a lifetime of dedication.

I’m finding that it can be difficult to help children to learn that things worth having are worth working hard for, and how to bounce back from disappointment or failure when things don’t go your way.

Grit and resilience is something we need to work on as adults, too. Perhaps you’re struggling with confidence or motivation, or life has just become too overwhelming. Coaching can give you a greater awareness and appreciation of all that you are capable of; a renewed focus, structure and purpose; and the tools and support to reach your goals.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Coaching

It’s a journey, not a race

Meme on living in your own time and not others'
Someone sent this to me today and the sentiment vividly reminded me of a three-way peer coaching session that I participated in back in 2013.

When it was my turn to take on the role of the person being coached, I was talking about all the things that I felt I ought to be doing. My coach asked me: “Why are you in such a hurry?” It was a bit of an epiphany, to be honest. Why, indeed?

One of my personal challenges has been my learned tendency to link high achievement with my self-esteem; a singularly unhelpful need to compare my performance against the ‘elite’ in all arenas of my life.

The desire for achievement is important, but can hold us back from being truly happy in our own skin if we end up always looking at how we’re stacking up against everyone else. Learning, growth and success manifest themselves in lots of different ways. Strive on your terms: it’s not a race but a journey, and you’re very much on time, all present and correct.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Personal development

Pilgrimage

Hands clasped together
In May this year, my 9 year-old son and I walked the Sarria to Santiago stretch of the Camino de Santiago. It was about a year after I’d had to take time off after having had a mental health crisis and going on pilgrimage was a decision made as part of a new direction and a resolution to embrace new experiences.

This photo was taken just before our final day’s walk into Santiago de Compostela – pilgrims nearing the end of this stage of their journey, hand in hand and stronger for it.

I think life is a pilgrimage. We rise each morning, fulfil what we need to fulfil, and take rest so that we can rise again the next day. Part of the beauty of life on the Camino is its simplicity. It’s a lesson for us all in this ever-more-complicated and cluttered normality – we need much less than we burden ourselves with. You don’t need to go on a physical pilgrimage to commence the same journey of discovery.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

Personal development

Crisis, discovery and reinvention

rugby
2016 was a year of reinvention, sparked by a crisis that I’d been building up to since 2013. Hitting rock bottom can be the making of you, given time and space to heal, a little bit of determination, and someone to hold your hand.

One of the key things in my recovery was seeking out new experiences. We don’t figure out ways forward by sitting down and figuring things out. For me, some of those new experiences were joining a choir, going on pilgrimage on the Camino de Santiago, and starting to play rugby. I’ve just embarked on a year-long sabbatical to focus on what I have learnt brings me genuine fulfilment: helping people to reach their full potential through awareness, understanding, openness to learning, and action.

I like this photo because for me it epitomises doing things that you’d never normally expect of yourself. I’m often the smallest on the pitch, I’m far from being a good player, and I have loads to learn. But I’m going to get out there anyway, pushing the comfort zone (notably when it comes to tackles!), and remembering that you are often your biggest obstacle. You don’t need to be.

– Written by Natalie Snodgrass Tan, Quiet Space Ltd

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